Being sexy.
And historically, no matter whether we're winning or losing (or just flat out sucking), the Cubs have always led the league in looking great doing it.
Just look at what we've brought to the plate (...ahem) over the years:
Now that is a mustache. Great work Billy, way to represent.
However, after the transactions by the front office this last off-season, at least this Cubs fan is feeling like management has begun to lose touch with the foundations of sex appeal and overall manliness that this team has built its reputation on.
Let's recap some of the new faces that are breaking camp this weekend:
Jason Marquis. Ex-Cardinal. Figures.
Juan Mateo.
Ted Lilly. Honestly, does that look like a face worth $10 mil a year?
Ceasar Izturis.
Neal Cotts. Used to be on the White Sox. Really figures.
Alfonso Soriano.I'll admit it, Fonzy is young and isn't bad looking. Out of all of the new guys, he by far has the most potential. I'm just saying, for all the money we're paying him to miff flies in center, he'd better live up to it.
There is one blatant conclusion that we can draw from all of this: Jim Hendry is not gay.
In fact, he might be quite the opposite, maybe to the extreme. How can anyone forget who he gave up last season.
Thats right. Todd Walker. Far and away the sexiest man in baseball.
And what did we get for him?
...
Jose Ceda. Now pitching in the farm system for us...in Idaho (we have a team in Idaho?)
Jose was too scared to even take a team photo, well aware that he can't live up to his side of the deal.
Shame on you, Jim.
But for all the poor decisions he made over the off season, Hendry made it all better by re-signing perhaps the best-looking of the players from last season's squad:
Thank God we have at least two more years of basking in the glorification of pure man that is Henry Blanco (with an option for 2009).
--rfs
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